9/5 Friendships Throughout Time
“Who has been someone that has unexpectedly stuck by your side over the years? Someone who years ago you never would have guessed would still be around, but everyday you’re grateful they’re here still? What do you cherish about their friendship?”
A curious thing happened when I wrote this post—for no reason at all, technical difficulty hit and deleted a few juicy paragraphs I had written about my dear friend, Amber.
So, instead of trying to rewrite our story and remember everything I had put into words, I want to take this as a sign from the universe that this should be told differently. How we met, what we have gone through over the years, and how we have preserved our friendship is a beautiful tale…and hilarious when I weave in all the silly parties and concerts and dinners we have shared. Yet, maybe that’s not what really matters for this journal entry. Maybe, what the universe wants to me express, is why I am truly grateful this human being has stuck by my side, and that is: a c c e p t a n c e.
Amber has accepted me through my different phases of life, watched me try on different identities, and loved me through all my triumphs and failures. When I look back on who we were when we met and who we have become, I am filled with many different memories of how much work it takes to commit to acceptance. There have been times when she or I didn’t agree, of course, but we put aside ego to devote ourselves to unity. Loving each other is not about being right or wrong, but dropping the little things and focusing on bigger pictures. We could have split ways or forgotten each other dozens of times, and yet, we have survived living across the country from one another for longer than ever living in the same state together.
When I close my eyes and think about what it means to be accepted, there is a big bright smile in my heart. Knowing I have someone in my corner is so valuable. Amber doesn’t sacrifice her opinions with me, and I can always rely on her to sort me straight. She is honest, compassionate, and willing to hold my hand, even when (looking back) I know I’ve been a total brat.
To accept me is to push me into authenticity. Showing me she can handle my dark shadows and cheer me on through times of success have been the greatest threads of strength in our friendship.
Acceptance means keeping each other accountable and learning how to call when we need to, take space when necessary, and swallow sadness when we cannot spend more time one on one.
I know I have a best friend not just through the extreme ups and downs, but through the mellow plateaus and unsatisfying routines, too. Sometimes its just a text, other times its a road trip around the midwest, and I cherish everything in between.
I love you, numba 1! Thank you for continuously showing up with acceptance, and reminding me the importance of kindness.